“Quitter’s Day”
a subtle reminder to pick yourself up and try again... and again... and again.
I love the month of January. Shamelessly, New Year’s Eve/Day is my favorite holiday. I love leaving the old year in the past, and making new promises to myself and others. I love the hype and the resolutions and the way the darkness and the cold of the month challenges every fiber of your being. It’s kind of a metaphor for life wrapped up into 31 days. First, you’re born. Fresh, full of hope. Then, at some point life hands you some opposition. Hopefully we meet this opposition with some gumption, grace, and fingers crossed there’s some perspective gained at the end of it. No one goes unscathed, but we continue on, we change our course, we adapt.
There are a lot of differing opinions about this time of year and the way we rush into new goals headfirst. I think our collective optimism and intensity should be celebrated, but perhaps lovingly redirected. We often start strong, and then slowly (or all at once) burnout or talk ourselves out of it.
There’s a day in January that calls attention to our crushed spirits - “Quitter’s Day”. It’s the second Friday in January, and this month it fell on January 9th. Did you make it past that point with all of your 2026 resolutions in tact? If not, you aren’t alone.
The goal is change... right?
No matter your goal(s) for 2026, they all revolve around this notion that some part of your current life doesn’t align with the idea you have for your future life. Whether it’s in business, relationships, your health, spirituality, living situations, habits… the list goes on and on. If it doesn’t feel good, it’s out, and what’s in is our desire for change - for things to be different.
For the record, I think it’s beautiful that there’s a specific time of year when we actually make space to contemplate who we are and who we want to become and the hurdles that stand between those two identities.
The problem comes when we don’t think it all the way through. The new year and all its beauty is no match for our self-doubt, inconsistency, or our past selves (really our current selves) talking our future selves out of their new found convictions.
What we really need are:
1. Attainable goals.
2. A sustainable and clear plan of action
3. Perspective
4. Accountability / cheer squad AKA PEOPLE
Attainable Goals
Newsflash: we are human. We are cunning and manipulative - especially when it comes to talking ourselves out of doing hard things. (Hint: every pattern you try to break will inevitably feel like a “hard” thing to your brain, who gets pretty comfy with routines - even if they are routines that don’t benefit your long-term self.)
That’s why you should start small. Don’t try to overhaul your life in one month.
If you’ve been paying attention to health trends then you will likely have heard of “75 Hard”. I know people who have completed it successfully, and while I think it’s incredible that they were able to achieve such an outrageous goal, I also know that some of us need to start smaller to gain momentum and build some confidence.
I decided at the start of the year that I would do what I am calling, “75 Soft”. It’s characterized by the following boundaries:
- No booze
- No Frivolous sugar
- No mindless spending
- One physical activity a day
- One creative endeavor a day
- One mind enhancer a day
As I’ve settled into January, some of these items have been easier to stand by than others. I’m not beating myself up about the mishaps (the ice cream I ate after skiing for 4.5 hrs was a learning experience that I don’t regret). However, there are certain items I refuse to budge on (mainly the no booze and one physical activity a day) as those were my two biggest goals that sparked this whole thing.
This is my way of getting closer to that version of myself I want to become, but without the burn out, the fatigue, or the beating myself up when I don’t do exactly what I think I “should” do.
A Sustainable Plan
Take my goal of one activity a day - I could not succeed in this without a very clear and sustainable plan. Life happens. January is a month full of birthdays, traveling, work stress, COLD WEATHER, and dark days that make you want to just curl up with a book and ignore the world.
If you had a similar goal (or any goal for that matter), and already abandoned ship, that’s okay, but it’s time to get back up and make yourself a plan that you can take action on. This is about long-term change, not short term success.
First, know your “why”. My goal to be active every day was driven by two over-arching goals:
I want to run a half marathon in 12 weeks
I want to practice consistency in exercise through the dreary (and long) northern Idaho winter/spring. (Seriously guys, it rains almost every day until June).
Start Planning
One of my Sunday activities is sitting down with a cup of coffee and plotting out my week of activities. I think through which days I will have the capacity for a run, which days will call for a shorter recovery activity like yoga, and which days I might want to be indoors doing a stationary bike session. Even though I plan the week out this way, I give myself permission to switch things around. Sometimes I plan a run on a Monday, but feel wiped going into the week already. Time to start small and work my way into it. In this case, I will swap my Monday run for something gentler like a walk and yoga before bed. The run gets moved to Tuesday or Wednesday and I still have to make it happen. The challenge is to listen to your body without giving in to its whims and manipulation tactics. I’m currently using canva to make an activity calendar that I can go back and easily edit when I’ve switched something up. Here’s what it looks like:
Perspective
This part is easier said than done. The definition of the word “Perspective” is: “a particular attitude toward or way of regarding something; a point of view.” Let that sink in a bit.
I listened to a remarkable podcast this week that talks about “mindfulness” as a way of being, not a thing to achieve - simply a decision to see the world differently. That’s all that perspective asks of us. With that in mind, is it possible to reframe your goal or assign language to it that will in turn help you make it more attainable? Like Ellen Langer’s research suggests, could you assign the word “play” to something that feels arduous? Chances are, if you do this and believe in it, you will experience some major wins.
Find a Cheer Squad
After you’ve simplified your goals, made a clear plan of action, and shifted your perspective, it’s time to tell some people what you’re up to. When we share our goals and our plans with others, we are not only setting ourselves up for success, we are also creating a deeper bond with the people we love. We are giving them the opportunity to support us, pull us through the mud, and cheer us on. We are also giving them permission to reach out to us when the roles are reversed. Choose people who have similar goals to you or people you know won’t try to talk you out of whatever goals you’re aiming for.
One of my favorite text threads that I have going is called, “running related”, and it’s just a couple of gals who love dabbling in running. We share goals, workouts, gear, and playlists and often times I think of them when I’m about to chicken out on a run. Sometimes it feels silly, but it’s effective and there’s really nothing better than sharing life with people.
So, even if January has already chewed you up and spit you out, I encourage you return to your goals and to your self again and again - as many times as it takes.
The full version of who you want to be won’t be realized in a month - you might not even be that person after a year of consistency. Real change takes time. It requires a series of yes’s and many no’s, and it also requires us to practice resilience, patience, and a little grace. At the end of the day, the goals we set out to achieve are just pieces of the puzzle. The process is where the magic lives.